FAILED ATTEMPT AT SOLITUDE
2018
Click on the image for information and accompanying poem.
If you could perform one act of power that would change your life, what would it be? I would sit down right in the core of my darkness, of my pain, of my loneliness. I would gather it into my heart and embrace it with kindness and gentleness and acceptance, with tenderness and love. Nothing less, nothing more. Just that. Having done that, I would do it again, and again. I would let the light flow freely, I would let the darkness flow freely. I would understand that I cannot know one without the other. I would let be. I would bow to the light in the darkness. I would bow to the darkness in the light.
In the summer of 2018, I went on a self-designed artist retreat in a cabin in the woods by the water. No toilet, no running water, fire outside to cook. I went to heal myself a little bit more. I lasted a month. I went into darkness. In that month, the following paintings and writings emerged.
What language do you speak?
I speak the language
of the cocoon:
I remain as I am until I emerge.
I emerge so beautifully.
I have to loosen first in the warmth.
When I come forth
Like a radiant full moon
There is the silence of my language;
I hear the inner sound
of the movement of featherlight wings
opening and closing
in the midnight sun
and the daylight moon.
What language do you speak, child? How much can you listen deeply to your own language?
Because there – right there – lies the power you seek. You think you are weak; you are simply confused.
Find your clarity. Stop looking and sit in it. That’s all.
What language do you speak, child? Go ahead and write your Book of Wounds. Go on.
You’ve held your breath for so long. Let out a long, deep, full outbreath.
Learn to breathe.
Learn to breathe.
July 5, 2018
